Thursday, March 27, 2008

When I'm a mom...I'll NEVER do that!

Oh, how I am eating those words!

These are the things that I thought I would never do/say or things I never understood until I had kids of my own. Obviously, not an extensive list.

1. Tucking shirts in. ****I don't do that anymore. I remember thinking it was crazy when moms would tell me that they hadn't tucked shirts into their pants since their children had been born. I mean, how hard is it to tuck a shirt in? I now understand. When is the last time I wore a belt for the sheer purpose of showing the belt off? Too long!

2. I didn't understand those parents who drove with one finger while reaching in the backseat to retrieve: pacifier, sippy cup, doll, book, snack, ANYTHING. I figured I would just let the tot "cry it out" until we reached our destination. ****Um, no way! I am an expert at the one finger driving while stretching my other arm practically out of its socket to get a dropped item.

3. Counting to three. It drove me crazy to hear parents say, "one....two....three....okay, I'm going to spank you now." Don't count! If the kid didn't do something the first time, spank them, they don't deserve the "counting cushion". ****I admit it, I count. I can't believe that I do. I am annoyed at myself for counting. I do NOT go past three though. If she hasn't complied by "three", it's spanking time.

4. Why doesn't that little girl have her hair "done"? Does her mom not allow herself enough time to get herself ready and fix her daughter's hair. Seriously, her daughter just looks like she rolled out of bed. Geez, my little girl will NEVER look like that! ****Okay, I am eating my words. There have been many days, especially since Miss Elyn arrived in our world, that Nora looks like she just rolled out of bed...because she has! I apologize to all of you moms of daughters out there. I now understand! Moms-to-be, it's okay to judge me and my daughter's rat-nest. You'll understand one day.

5. That child is TWO and is still using a pacifier? AND he/she is not potty trained. Seriously, do those parents even realize they have a child because they sure don't act like it. If they were good parents at all, they would have tried to tackle at least one of them. ****I would like for you all to meet my two year old, she still uses a pacifier at nighttime and at naptime. Oh, and she is not even close to being potty-trained! Right now I don't have the energy or the want to remedy either of those. I keep secretly hoping that she will figure out both on her own. I'll let you know how that goes.

6. You mean you let your child watch T.V.!!!!! Do you not have any books/crayons/finger paints/playdough/dolls/interactive toys at your house? How could you let "precious" watch t.v. when you could be using that time instructing him/her? AND you let your child watch t.v. in the car????? Time in the car should be for learning! Point out all the colors of God's Earth, help your child become aware of the letters and numbers on the signs, sing songs together. Do you even love your child? ****Nora can name every single character from Mickey Mouse Clubhouse, Dora, and Tigger and Pooh. I use the t.v. as a (gasp) babysitter while I am getting ready in the morning, and it works like a charm, thank you very much. We do not have a built-in DVD player in the car, but portable ones work just as well. She only watches the DVD player on long trips, but I have a plethora of children's CD's to occupy her when we are driving around I can think without interruption.

As mentioned before, this list is not exhaustive. I might add to it later. For every mom or dad out there that I judged before having my own children...I am sorry! I've taken off my rose-colored-uterus-never-been-occupied glasses and understand you a whole lot better. Thanks for paving the way!

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Julie Walker said...

Have you ever heard of the book " I was a good mom...until I had kids."? I haven't read it but would like to because there are so many things (especially the TV ) that I didn't think I would do and now do. It's okay, no one understands until they have kids of their own. ( I also didn't think I would let my kids have velcro shoes but boy, they are so easy for him to put on himself that I really don't care!!!)

The Pork Princess. said...

AMEN SISTER!!!! I thought I was the only mom who couldn't keep up!!! HA!

Chandra said...

Amen to every single one of those! I preached the evils of children watching t.v. until I had my own and now I avoid all of those articles on that talk about how many hours a week your child should watch t.v. so I don't sink into a deep depression. H watches WAY too much t.v. (love the portable car dvd player). Thanks for the post--helps me realize I'm not the only one who apparently set unachievable standards!!!

Traci said...

I found your blog through some other Harding friends. I was in Kojies with you at Harding. I think I was several years older than you, and I recognized your husband from your Easter pictures. Anyway, I had to comment because my daughter had her paci until she was three. We threw it away cold turkey on her third birthday. I went into her room last night to check on her and she was sucking like she still had that paci in her mouth and it's been over a year.

Your girls are beautiful. You can check out my blog at

Traci Busby Johnston

Jenn said...

Girl...I'm so with you! My kids love road trips because they get to watch as many movies as it takes to get there!!
Oh the things we think and say before we are parents (or when or kids are little and haven't gone though that stage yet!!) Oh how many words I have already eaten and have yet to eat because of my BIG mouth!!

April said...

I, too, was the world's best parent BEFORE I had kids. :) It's amazing how all those grand philosophies go out the window when the reality hits. It is humbling, isn't it?!

Hello blog buddies! It's me, Crouse! said...

this is exactly what i love about you. you are so funny and hit everything I think right ON THE NOSE! I am THAT parent that I always talked about...

Julie said...

AMEN! i do ALL of those things.

Danielle Balentine said...

I laughed all the way through because I sooooo relate. I especially relate with the tv watching. Fortunately, there are some great shows that really teach some great skills, or I have extremely lowered my standards, I don't know which:)

Sandi said...

Okay, um, I have never been much of a shirt-tucker-inner, but I've never claimed to be fashion-conscious either! :)

I'm with you on this post.

How is the 30 Days of Encouragement going?

Ginger said...

I am a friend of Sara Millers and that is how I found your blog. I LOVED your post and just had to add my thoughts.

Just wanted to add "Amen, Sister!!"
I have done all of those things and probably many more that I said I would NEVER do.
I have that book "I was a really good mom until I had kids." It should be required reading for all Moms. Hysterical book.
Thanks for sharing such honesty.

Sara said...

I am with you on fixing hair and letting the t.v. be a babysitter. Hopefully once life evens out that will change.

Shana said...

Oh that is hilarious! I am with you on every one of these things. I have to admit that the dvd player is on even when we are going around town...Hey at least Elmo is teaching the kids something. I also was very big on not letting my kids play video games all of the time and Easton is the king of XBOX 360.

Supabloggasuprememama said...

oh girl, amen to all these. screaming kids also drove me crazy. i didnt understand why their parents let them get so out of control...oh well. and the paci thing...yeah...its still a battle for us even DURING the day much less naptimes and bedtimes! oh well. oh well.

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